My Husband’s Bar Mitzvah

My husband, Charles, decided years ago that when he reached 83, 

he would celebrate his second Bar Mitzvah. The Bible [Psalm 90:10] 

considered 70 years an expected life span, thus, 13 years after that

number could be considered for a second Bar Mitzvah; my husband 

considered that a grand idea.

With the talented help of our Cantor, Charles began studying his Haftorah, 

the portion of the Torah he would read on a prescribed day. He actually 

did that reading for friends and family via Zoom as a  result of the Covid 

lock down. The party that usually follows this service was postponed and 

postponed yet again due to the regulations in place because of the pandemic.

Finally, the day was set. We decided to do it outside under a tent and 

assure everyone that all coming had been vaccinated.

God gave us a most beautiful Sunday afternoon for the long 

awaited celebration. Our college age grandchildren flew in 

from their various colleges. All of our grandchildren state 

side were there. The one grandson studying and interning in 

Israel would see pictures and hear about it all from us 

and other family members.

My state during this memorable day? 

Have you ever floated through a special moment as 

if floating on a cloud?  Well, that’s exactly how I felt.

Everyone in that room was filled with love for everyone else. 

At the various tables were our forever siblings, our dear friends [many for over half a century], 

those who are beautiful family and friends via our children’s marriages, 

and our children’s friends whom we’ve known for a lifetime. We kept 

those precious people who could not make it in our heart of hearts.

Our Rabbi Emeritus, his wife, and the Cantor were there too. 

There were newer friends and neighbors from our condo 

joining the celebration, and of course, there were the guest 

speakers: my husband and three daughters .

My husband spoke first. He addressed our love for 

all invited. He spoke of our Rabbi who had  been 

there for our three girls’ B’not Mitzvah, marriages, 

and baby namings. Charles spoke of our great love 

for the people sitting before us and the joy we knew 

in raising our three girls. He mentioned our 

beloved sons-in-law and our adored eight grandchildren.

Then each of our girls spoke. 

        RAMY 

Ramy, our middle daughter, told tales of growing up Shalotsky. 

She showed pictures to illustrate many of those moments. 

Among the funniest stories she told were the outfits I 

created for our daughters, for my mother, and for me.

 Ramy noted how people often thought we were a singing 

group who dressed alike. If they had heard us sing, 

they would have known better. 

My sewing was haphazard at best, but every stitch 

was was sewn with love. Ramy then pointed to what 

she called the Amish outfit, the singing group outfit, 

and one, even she couldn’t make out. [It was the pixie Halloween outfits.].

Everyone laughed. It was all joyous and loving. Ramy 

felt she grew up in a loving home and that made me very happy.

                    ROBI

Robi [the eldest] also spoke, “spontaneously” as she noted, 

but very ready and with great enthusiasm. 

She spoke of a fun and loving home filled with friends and family. 

Those were her memories and I found them touching.

                    LORI

Lori, our youngest, addressed the stories created by 

her sisters to explain away disheartening teenage social moments. 

She told how her sisters defined any guy that seemed mean to a Shalotsky girl 

would go “bald” [My girls have very vivid imaginations.] 

Then Lori pointed to the men in our family sitting there with - 

you got it - beautiful hair. Our youngest daughter like her sisters

before her was quite hilarious! And I loved hearing her fun 

and love filled memories.

I sat there on my magic cloud thanking God for those 

moments, both past and current . They were fun, 

they were loving, and they were remembered. They all 

added up to the now and I was thankful.

Our cozy home in Chatham was always filled with love and 

fun and a big welcome to all who entered. Charles 

and I loved every single moment, and how blessed to 

hear our daughters remembering it that way too.

Those who lived those memories with us were at this luncheon. 

We loved them then and have loved them more over the years.

Our newer friends have joined that group of 

special people and new memories.

And those who were not there were surely 

remembered with profound love.

It was a room filled with people that give much affection 

and kindness. It was definitely my kind of world, 

one of shared love and respect.

If rays of love could be beamed out from that party 

to the world, it would surely bring much happiness 

to the many it touched.

I am so grateful and thankful for people like those 

invited to my husband’s Bar Mitzvah Luncheon, 

and I am so appreciative to those who read this blog,

You too bring that kind of loving glow to the world.

You brighten daily life which is a much needed gift in this world.

I wish you all the most beautiful October.